


True To You

by iCarlyfan312



Category: iCarly
Genre: Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-02-21
Updated: 2013-02-09
Packaged: 2014-11-06 21:48:07
Rating: K+
Chapters: 13
Words: 17,309
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6764142/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/2106035/iCarlyfan312
Summary: Freddie and Sam don't like each other let alone love each other. When a tragedy strikes one of them, will it tear them apart or make them closer together?





	1. Strange

**A/N: Hope you all like this BRAND NEW story! Please review.**

**Summary: Freddie and Sam don't like each other let alone **_**love **_**each other. When a tragedy strikes one of them, will it tear them apart or make them closer together?**

**Based (sort of) of Nicholas Sparks Novel: **_**A Walk to Remember**_

**Chapter 1: Strange**

Sam was writing in a journal. One she usually used to write in like a diary, but she refused to call it that. Calling it that is way too girly for her. So she just called it a journal.

_January 23rd_

_Why is Benson so, what's the word, nerdy? Carly, Freddip, and I went to the Groovy Smoothie. He would not stop talking about pie! Not the pie that you eat, the pie in math. The only reason I know that pie has to do with pie is when my teacher said we'd be studying pie, I thought she meant ACTUAL pie. She made me so mad. He was talking all about what you can do with it. What the chiz am I gonna do with Math pie in the future? Absolutely none. El Zippo. _

_I gotta go. Mom's yelling at the cat, again!_

_One angry, hungry girl,_

_Sam Puckett _

She closed the "journal" and put it in her sock drawer towards the bottom.

Her phone beeped. She picked up to see who it was. Carly. Of course.

_R U gonna b at rehearsal? Freddie and I wanna go over that new segment. text me bck. ;) -Carly_

Wow, she was girly.

_I'll be there in 15-Sam_

She tucked the phone in her side pocket and ran down the stairs.

"Mom, can you drive me to Carly's?"

"Frothy! Get a job, NOW!"

"Take that as a no." She decided that if she took the bus she'd still be there in fifteen minutes like she had promised Carly. She grabbed money on the counter that her mom was supposed to buy food with. She forgot.

She walked out of her house and to the bus stop. And after a minute one came. She stepped on.

"A dollar please," A deep voice said. She handed the money to the bus driver. "Thank you so much." She walked to the back of the bus and sat in a empty seat.

She arrived at the Bushwell Plaza about ten minutes later. She walked into Carly's apartment and went up in the elevator and was in the iCarly studio.

"Hey, Sam, you're on time, shocking..." Freddie said.

"Shut up, diphead!"

"Okay, okay," Carly said, "chill out. we need to rehearse this, we have a show tomorrow night."

"Whatever, just keep Benson away from me," Sam said.

"Yeah, and keep _that _away from me." Freddie said.

"Okay..." Carly said.

Poor Carly.

* * *

"Sam, you okay?" Carly asked after rehearsal.

"No, I'm not feeling too well. It's weird; I was feeling okay this morning."

"Maybe you should go to a doctor."

"Maybe."

"I've gotta run. Spencer is gonna forget to pick up dinner, so I better get it." Carly left leaving Freddie and Sam in the apartment.

"Hey, so um, how've you been?" Freddie questioned.

"Okay, I guess. Nothing super exciting going on. Just regular stuff. What about you?"

"Same stuff."

"Ah."

"Um, are you okay? I know Carly just asked you that, but I feel like there's something you're hiding."

"Don't tell Carly, but I went to the doctor and he said he'd like to take some tests. Whatever that means."

"Well, why would he want to run tests? Is it serious?"

"I don't think so. I just am trying not to tell Carly. You know she'll freak out. Why do you wanna know?"

"I was worried." What?

"You were?"

"Yeah. I mean, I was just hoping you were okay." She was kind of struck by that.

"But why?"

"You're seriously asking me that?"

"Yup."

"Nope. Not saying anything."

"Say it!"

"No!"

"Say it!"

"NO!"

"SAY IT!"

"I LOVE YOU!" Sam froze. _One more time?_

"What did you just say?" She thought for sure, 100% without a doubt she was the craziest person in the world. Did she hear right?

"I said I love you. I hate the way you make me mad, but I love everything else about you. I don't know I just fell for you."

"Wow, um, that was, unexpected."

"I'm sorry."

"Why are you sorry? It all makes sense." She thought for a moment. It felt...strange...because everything just fit.

"We can't do this. Don't pretend like you love me, Puckett. I love you, but you don't love me back. I'm not going to make you do anything you don't want to do." She didn't know what she felt or how she felt it, she just knew she felt something.

He started to leave. "Freddie! Don't go!" He stopped, "You don't know that. Lately, I've had too much on my plate. You've been looking at me different and I know why now," She finally came to a realization that she did love Freddie. She thought about everything leading up to their first kiss.

He started to walk again. "Freddie!"

"What?"

"I love you!" In that moment she knew she did love Freddie. So much that she had decided to push it out of her mind. She walked up to him and grabbed his face and pulled his lips to hers.

Carly walked in with Spencer and looked at each other. "You owe me forty bucks," Carly said.

* * *

So, Sam and Freddie were together. He took her to the doctor the next day.

"Hi, Mam, what can I do you for?" A nurse said.

"My name is Sam Puckett. I'm here to see Doctor Reynolds."

"Samantha?"

"Yes." She always forgot she had to use her full name when she came to the doctor.

"Come on back."

"This is my boyfriend, can he come?" The first time she'd said that. It felt good.

"If he'd like." Sam looked at Freddie.

"Okay." They walked into a room down the hall and took a seat.

"She'll be back in a bit."

"Thank you." The nurse left them alone.

"Are you okay?" Sam asked Freddie.

"I'm scared. Just the fact that you might be real sick is killing me."

"Aw, don't worry. I'm probably fine."

"Sam," Dr. Reynolds called. "We can test you now. Follow me."

"I love you." Sam said. Freddie kissed her quickly and they followed the nurse.

Later on, Sam would not able to stand what was coming for her.

**A/N: Hope you liked the first chapter! Please review. Happy President's Day!**


	2. Good News, Bad News

**A/N: Hey there! You guys have been wanting another chapter of this for awhile now. So, here it is. Enough said.**

**Disclaimer: Never owned iCarly, Never will:(**

**Chapter 2: Good News, Bad News**

Freddie left while they ran some tests. He was very panicky. He just didn't want anything to be wrong with Sam. He loved her.

He heard a door open behind him. He turned around, still sitting, to see it was Sam.

"Hey," She said. She kissed him quickly, "They'll have the results tomorrow."

"Will they call you?" He questioned.

"No, I'll have to come back. You can come back with me if you wanna."

"Only if it's okay with you."

"It's better than okay." He kissed her hand and they walked down to the exit hand in hand.

Freddie opened the passenger door for Sam. She got in the car and he did to. He put his head and hands on the wheel.

"Freddie, what's wrong with you? I mean you look like you got hit by a bus or something." She put her hand on his shoulder.

"I'm fine, Puckett. I really-"

"Benson." She looked at him. She knew him enough to know when he was lying.

"Okay, you got me. I'm just really worried about you."

"Don't be," She cupped his face in her hands and made him look at her, "whatever happens, you won't lose me and I won't lose you. I promise you that." She kissed his forehead. He hugged her. "I love you, Sam. I've always, always loved you." Sam let a tear escape her eye. "I love you too, Freddie." She hugged him tighter, never wanting to let go.

* * *

Freddie pulled up to Carly's apartment building.

"Here we are," Freddie said, putting the car in park.

"Yup," Sam replied.

"Are you gonna tell Carly?" He asked, curiously.

"Not just yet. I mean I'll tell her tomorrow and it won't matter because I'm fine."

"I hope so," He kissed her.

About ten minutes later, they were upstairs on Carly's floor. They were standing in the hallway between Carly's and Freddie's apartment. Sam took a deep breath and went in. Freddie went in after her.

"Hey, hey." Carly said, happily.

"What are you all happy about?" Sam asked.

"Well, one, I'm excited that you two are FINALLY together and two, now that you guys are together, I'm forty bucks richer." She smiled widely.

"I can't believe you bet Spencer we would get together," Freddie said.

"Hey, I knew it'd happen, so why not make some money off of it?" She said, thinking it was a good thing.

"You're becoming more and more like Sam..." Sam gave Carly a high five, "It's not a good thing."

Carly and Sam laughed. "So where've you guys been? You just kind of left earlier."

"Uh..." Freddie looked at Sam.

"We went to celebrate at El Taco Guapo," She responded quickly.

"For four hours?"

"Uh-huh." _Please buy it, please buy it, _Sam said.

"Well, okay. How've you been feeling, Sam?" Sam looked at Freddie then back to Carly.

"The same."

"Well, have you made an appointment with a doctor?"

"Carly, don't worry okay? I'm fine." _I hope,_ She thought.

"Okay just checkin'."

"So, what's Spencer been up to?" Freddie said, trying to change the subject.

"Well, he has a new girlfriend, Scarlet. She's pretty nice. There out on a date."

"Spencer and Scarlet?" Freddie said aloud. Sam shrugged.

"Can I crash here tonight?" Sam asked.

"What about your house?"

"My mom, she's been yelling and screamin' at the cat for the past couple nights. It's driving me insane." That wasn't the only thing that was making her insane.

"Sure."

"Well, I got to get home. My Mom will come looking for me," Freddie said.

"Alright, see you later." Sam went over and hugged him.

"Aw!" Sam and Freddie turned to look at her, "And I ruined the moment. I'll be over that way." She pointed to the kitchen. Sam hugged him again.

"I love you. I'll see you tomorrow." She whispered on his shoulder.

"When should I pick you up?"

"Between nine, nine-thirty."

"What are you gonna tell her?" He asked.

"You let me worry about that." She kissed his cheek.

"I love you," Freddie said. He blew a kiss to Sam and left Carly's apartment.

Sam turned around to see Carly smiling.

"Stop that!"

"You guys are too cute."

"Yeah, yeah."

* * *

Freddie knocked on Carly's door. Carly yawned and looked at the time. "Nine- twenty?" She got off the couch and opened the door.

"Oh, hey, Freddie. What're you doin' here so early?" Carly asked.

"Where's Sam?" He asked. He expected Sam would open the door.

"She's upstairs."

"Oh, I was gonna take her out for breakfast."

"Well you can go get her if you wanna."

"'kay." He went up the stairs. He heard a heavy breathing, almost wheezing. He opened Carly's bedroom door. Sam laid on the floor; the breathing was coming from her. "SAM!" He went to her side. "SAM!"

"Freddie, help...help me." Freddie started to cry. He didn't know what to do.

"SAM!" He cried. "CARLY! HELP, SAM'S HURT!"

"Freddie, what is it-OH MY GOD! SAM!" They called the ambulance and they came immediately. Freddie rode with Sam in the ambulance, still crying. Spencer drove Carly to the hospital. Once they were there, Sam was wheeled into a room. Freddie and Carly stood in the hallway.

"Okay, spill," Carly said.

"Spill what?" Freddie asked, confused.

"Freddie, don't you play stupid with me. I know you know what's wrong with her. So, tell me."

He sighed, "She had some tests done. We were going to get the results this morning."

"Is she gonna be okay? Is she hurt? Why didn't she tell me?"

"Well, this is why! She knew you'd freak out. She thought she was fine."

"Well, why didn't _you _tell me?" She said.

"I promised her I wouldn't." Freddie put his hands on the back of his neck. He started crying again, "Carly, I don't want her to be hurt! I'm so scared! And here we are fighting about something stupid. The girl I've loved since I can remember is hurt! So sorry I didn't tell you and, no offense, I couldn't care less right now that I didn't!" Carly stood there for a moment, soaking in what he'd just said.

"I'm sorry, Freddie." She said, trying to comfort him.

"Me too."

"Excuse me, are you here for Samantha Puckett?" A doctor came and said to Carly and Freddie.

"Yes," Freddie answered, "is she okay?"

"You should sit down." Freddie and Carly did what was asked of them.

"Miss Puckett is got herself in a bind," Carly and Freddie waited for him to say something else, "She has Leukemia."

**A/N: Sorry if I made you cry and/or mad. Let me tell you to KEEP READING. It'll be worth it, I promise. ;) This is one of the most moving stories I've ever written. It's definitely moved me. **


	3. Love, Life and Questions

**A/N: Hey y'all! Between my new story, ****iMade A Stupid Wish**** and finishing ****iHave Another Side****, I haven't gotten around to this in a while. I'm absolutely sure 100% sure that you guys are awesome! Great reviews! :)**

**Disclaimer: I'm not Dan Schneider...we wouldn't have to wait for iLost My Mind if I was. So no I don't own iCarly:(**

**Chapter 3: Love, Life and Questions**

"What?" Freddie said as he stood up, "No she's fine! You're lying!"

"Mr. Benson, I know she's your girlfriend, but please listen to me. She has Leukemia." Freddie sat down again and looked at the floor.

"Is she gonna..." Freddie didn't want to say the last word. It was too much to take.

"I don't know, but it's early on so there's a chance she'll live," Dr. Reynolds tried to cheer Freddie up.

"I wanna see her," He said, blankly.

"Of course," Dr. Reynolds directed him to Sam's room. What would Sam say? Had the doctor told her? Was she scared? All these questions made him want to see her more.

"Here, Mr. Benson." Freddie walked in the room. Sam was lying there, eyes closed. He wondered if she knew.

"Hey, Beautiful," He said. Sam awoke and saw it was Freddie.

"Hey, take a seat." He took a seat in a chair near her bed.

"Do you know?" _Please say no,_ Freddie thought. He just didn't want her to hurt.

"Yes, I know," Freddie looked down again.

"Are you scared?" He asked.

"Yeah, I am," She took Freddie's hand, "Look at me," He looked at Sam, "I've known there wasn't something right for a while, like a week. The odds of me getting this were not good. But, you know me and odds," She grinned, "I'm gonna stay alive as long as I can. However long I stay, I want to spend what time I've got with you," Freddie kissed her hand.

"I don't want you to go," He quietly said.

"Freddie, I'm not going anywhere, you understand?" Freddie nodded, "I'm gonna fight it. I will fight it for me, for you, for us."

"Are you gonna take chemo?" He asked her.

"I have to," She said, trying to comfort him, "but they said-"

"This is stupid! You're sixteen! You're beautiful! Why does this have to happen?" He held back tears.

"Like I said, me and odds." Freddie looked at her deeply.

"I'm gonna do everything I can to make you survive," Freddie said to her, "I promise you."

"That's all I can ask for." She kissed his forehead gently.

* * *

_January 26th _

_So, yesterday I fainted and found out I have the big C. Yup, I've got cancer. Fredley and I also have started dating. Long story. He's really worried about me. I'm sitting here, where I woke up at 9AM I see Benson in the chair beside me, out like a light. He stayed here all night. I've been watching him sleep. Is that creepy? I heard this quote from some Soap Opera that said, 'You know you really love someone when you watch them sleep'. I've been watching them because that's all they have on at the hospital. Well, Benson is starting to wake up. Later._

_Wish me luck,_

_Sam_

Freddie stretched a little, "What are you doin'?"

"Waiting for you to get up. Did you really stay here all night?" Sam asked. She thought he'd left after he went out of the room to talk to Carly and Spencer.

"You thought I was lying when you said I'd be here for you?" Freddie smiled.

"No, I just think it's sweet. I'm glad you're up. I'd be stuck watching Soap Operas if you weren't," Sam laughed, "Isn't it funny how I don't want to watch them, but I'm in one?"

"What are you talking about?" Freddie was so confused. The girl he loved made no sense at times.

"You know me having...you know," Freddie knew she was more scared then she had said, but you know Sam and her tough girl image.

"Sam..." Freddie's face turned serious.

"C'mon, Freddie lighten up!" Sam encouraged.

"How is it funny, Sam?" Her face turned serious, "Why aren't you scared?"

"I'm only scared of leaving you. Losing you," She said, "I don't want to leave you! I want to stay and be happy and never have to go through this! I have to joke or it makes me cry and think about losing you," She started to sob, "All this time and we finally say we love each other and I'm gonna lose you! I love you!" She was so upset. Freddie let tears slip too.

"Sam..." He pulled her into a hug, "I love you, we won't lose each other. I promise." She cried and he eventually laid down beside her, held her and stroked her hair until she fell asleep in his arms.

* * *

"Spencer, what are we gonna do?" Carly asked, sitting on her couch in and her brother Spencer's apartment.

"I don't know, kid. I guess we should treat her like nothing's changed. That way she doesn't have to think about it," Spencer said, before taking a sip of his Peppi Cola.

"I knew something was wrong! I should've done something! I done want her to die!" Carly flinched at the last word as she said it.

Spencer walked over and sat on the couch next to Carly.

"Kiddo, there was nothing you could do. It wasn't your fault. I know we'll get through this." Spencer put his hand on Carly's shoulder.

"Just tell me Sam's gonna be okay." Carly said looking at Spencer.

"I can't tell you that," He said, frowning. Carly contemplated this for a moment. She might die. She might not. She might never do iCarly again. How was she supposed to go on without her best friend? And what about Freddie? How is he gonna do iCarly without Sam? He won't. How is she supposed to help Freddie? His pain would be overwhelming if she went. Carly would be in so much pain if she went.

"I don't want to lose my best friend." She hung her head down.

"I know."

* * *

"So, when do you start Chemo?" Freddie asked.

"I'm not sure, I think sometime this morning," Sam said, quietly.

Sam was lying next to Freddie in the hospital bed. They were facing each other.

"Do you love me?" Sam asked. Freddie looked at her like she had lost her mind, "I mean I'm gonna have to go through all of it and I won't look the same for a while. I'll lose my hair. I don't want you to love me any less than you do now."

"Sam, I didn't fall in love with your hair," Freddie assured her, "I fell in love with you. You're hair is beautiful and it will grow back. You will always be Sam Puckett, no matter what you look like."

"I love you, Fredley," Sam smirked.

"Really? The name calling?" Freddie gave her a Way-to-Ruin-the-Moment look.

"Sorry, it was getting too mushy and it was creepin' me out." Freddie chuckled.

"Samantha Puckett?" A nurse walked in. She looked about mid thirty's and she was short. She had brown hair and blue eyes. She was holding a clipboard.

"Please, call me Sam. I'd like something to be the same."

"Well, Sam, we'd like to start your chemo." She said it slowly as though she would cause an uproar if she said it too fast.

"Sure. Freddie, will you be here when I get back?" Sam asked.

"Where else would I be?" They both smiled.

"Alright, Sam. Let's get you onto this wheel chair," She said, pulling a wheelchair to the side of the hospital bed, "Mr. Benson would you mind putting Sam in the wheelchair? I forgot her chart. I'll be just a minute."

"Sure." Freddie picked up Sam wedding style. Freddie kissed her like he would never see her again. Then, he put her gently down onto the wheelchair.

"Alright, let's go," The nurse said and wheeled her out. Sam blew a kiss to Freddie and mouthed 'I love you'.

Freddie was left alone in Sam's room.

He started to pray for Sam.

"Look, I know Sam can be unbearable and terrible. She can also be loveable and wonderful. She doesn't deserve this. Please don't make her die. I beg you. I'll do anything. I love her. Please don't do this for me. Do it for her, she deserves it."

Freddie smiled. He pulled out a picture of Sam. It was taken only a few days ago. Before this all began.

Question was: How would it end?

**A/N: Thanks for your support! Please review.**


	4. For Me, It's You

**A/N: Hey everybody! Here's a new chapter!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly. If I did Sam and Freddie would not have broken up in iLove You :(**

*****Story changed from 3rd to 1st person: Sam's POV*****

**Chapter 4: For Me, It's You**

Freddie was still in the room, thinking. Just thinking about me. The odds had never been good with me. I can second that. I'd always been someone Freddie thought he hated. He loved me because he knew underneath me was another Sam Puckett. I am like a turtle. I keep my real feelings in a shell until they pop out on their own.

It's cheesy, but Freddie had always pictured him and me, forever. Nothing would tear us apart. Happily ever after. I'm afraid the only time that happens, is in the fairytales.

He thought he should leave. He tried, but he couldn't. He never wanted to leave me alone. Freddie started to notice the little things about me as did I about him. The way my smile sparkled, the way I looked at him, everything.

Now, I was here. In a hospital because I had cancer. The odds. Well, they were split. 50-50, half and half, either way, I may die.

Die. That's the one word that Freddie never wanted to hear. Not being able to me every day? Having to wonder what would've happened next for us? Even the thought of it made Freddie terrified. I may be a demon, but Freddie knew I'd always be, no matter what, _his _demon. That made him smile. I was strong. Freddie just hoped it was enough.

Freddie realized he had been sitting there for an entire hour. Just then, the nurse wheeled me back in the room. I looked a little flushed, but I smiled at him. I was already worried enough for the both of us. The nurse almost picked me up, but Freddie stopped her.

"I got it," The nurse nodded and walked out of the room. Freddie gently picked me up. It was silent for a moment.

"So..." Freddie started. He held me up, holding me wedding style.

"Freddie, I don't want this." I said.

"Fine, then I'll-" I cut him off. He was making this hard.

"Freddie I've had a lot of time to think. I don't want you to worry. Please, for me," He shook his head setting me on the bed gently.

"I'm sorry, I can't do that," He took my hand, "I don't want to lose you. Who would make me feel so many things if you weren't around? I just...want to know what you want...just in case."

"I love you," I kissed him gently on his cheek and pulled out a list, "I know it's weird. I made a Bucket List."

"When did you make this?" He asked, as I handed it to him.

"Last night," He was shocked, "I'm too upset to sleep, what am I gonna do?"

He scrolled through it, but one really caught his eye. It was number one.

Get Married.

"I thought you didn't like the idea of weddings," he said. I smiled, but it faded. I couldn't do this to him.

"Freddie, I need to talk to you," I said, "I need you to do something for me."

"Anything." He smiled that goofy smile I love to see.

"I need you to go on," He looked slightly confused, "When I'm gone, I need you to find someone who makes you feel just like I feel about you. I want you to know I love you and I will until I stop breathing. Maybe even then." Freddie lost it.

"_You're _not going anywhere!" Freddie said, holding back tears, "I've always hated you! I've always hated you, Sam Puckett! I have always loved you more. I want to be with you as long as I have you." His kissed me, not giving me a chance to speak. I kissed back, letting a tear fall. "You're asking me to let you go." He let tears slip, "I can't let go of the girl I love."

"You're such a dork, but that's not why I love you." I said, fiddling with my fingers. Correction: That's not the only reason I love him. I could go on for days saying everything that makes me love him.

He looked confused, "Then why _do _you love me?"

"I love you because you're my best friend. You're someone I'm always gonna love. You're my soul mate," He let a tear slip, "and alive or dead it's not gonna change a thing. You'll still be Freddie. I just won't be around to bug you." I studied my hands.

I know I didn't deserve him. I also knew I couldn't live without him. Have you ever pictured that one person you want to spend the rest your life with? Well, for me, that's him.

"Sam," I looked up and Freddie's tear-stained face, "I love you because you're the best person I've ever known. Fifty years from now, Everyone will want someone who they know they'll love to grow old with. Someone beautiful and wonderful." He paused and I sniffled, "For me, it's you." I looked at him. I started to sob.

"I-I lo-love you." I said in between sobs. Freddie crawled into the hospital bed and lay beside me. He held me close and I cried into his chest. "It's okay, I'm here." He started to cry too, "I love you, Sammy."

* * *

Freddie had gone home. I woke up the next morning and took a shower at the hospital. I was washing my hair and humming. Then I noticed my hair felt shorter. I looked at my hands and screamed.

An hour later, Freddie showed up, looking for me.

"Yeah, I'm here to see Sam. Sam Puckett."

"Listen, she'd upset and she's not doing well, I-" Freddie urgently interrupted.

"I need to see her now!" He yelled. She pointed down the hall. He dashed and walked into my room. What he saw made him stop in his tracks.

"I thought you were hurt." He came over and lay beside me, letting out a sigh of relief.

"Freddie, I couldn't stand it. I had to do it." I looked down ashamed at my appearance.

"Hey, I still think you look beautiful." If only I could've thought that highly of myself at that particular moment.

"I'm bald! Bald!" Freddie grabbed my hand, and wiped tears that had escaped from my eyes, "I was in the shower and I had clumps of hair in my hands! Clumps! I wasn't going to sit there and watch myself go bald, hair by hair. Now I look awful. I mean-" Freddie interrupted.

"I loved your hair. But that's _not_ why I love you. You know that." I smiled. That was the first time I really knew. I really knew he loved _me_, and that meant the world to me.

"It'll grow back. Honestly, you look beautiful with or without your hair," He concluded. I let a happy tear slip as a smile crept over my lips. He kissed me softly.

"Ms. Puckett?" A doctor came in, "Are you alright?"

"I'm dying, but other than that everything's okay." He grinned sadly at my trying-to-be-but-not-really-funny joke. Freddie gave me a look, "What?"

"Well, um, Mr. Benson, could I see you in the hall for a second please?" He looked at me. I nodded and said, "Go, it's okay."

He kissed me deeply. I could tell how much emotion he was holding back. To be honest, most guys would be gone at this point. They'd go find another girl. Freddie just wanted me. Bald and very sick me. I can't express how much I love that boy.

He walked out after blowing a kiss to me.

"Mr. Benson, she's responding well to the treatment," the doctor said.

"That's great news!" Freddie said, enthusiastically.

"Whoa, don't get too excited. I just don't know if that will be enough." Freddie's face fell.

"What're you saying?" He didn't want to hear the answer.

"Her chances of dying are greater than her chances of living." Freddie let tears fall. He collapsed on the floor, crying. I heard Freddie crying and I knew something was wrong, but I pretended I didn't have a clue.

**A/N: Sometimes my own righting makes me cry. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? ;) Thanks for reading and please look at my profile for a contest! Anyone can enter! Please review! :D**


	5. Four Words

**A/N: Hey y'all! It's me with a new chapter! Enjoy! I changed the theme song for this one. It's now "Heartbeat" by The Fray. It's a perfect fit. First post of 2012! Yeah! I will favorite the first person to review! ;)**

**Disclaimer: I never have owned iCarly. I don't and probably never will:(**

**Chapter 5: Four Words**

_January 28th _

_So, I hear I'm closer to seeing the big guy. What else is new? Except nobody knows I know. Freddie hasn't been here since yesterday. I'm scared he'll leave. This will be too much for him. My hair's gone. I'm scared._

_Terrified,_

_Sam Puckett_

Freddie walkedin and I shut and hid the journal quickly.

"Hey, beautiful." I looked away from him. "What is it?"

I didn't want him to do this. I couldn't let him take all the pain. I had to do what I do best: push him away. On any other situation, I wouldn't have to, but this is Freddie. Not the dorky Freddie I used to know. _My_ Freddie. My escape. Every day he stayed would cause him more heartache. I couldn't do that to anyone. Especially not him.

"Just go," I said, holding back my tears. This was the hardest thing I ever had to do.

"What? Why? I-I can't leave. Wh-What're you even talking about?" He was freaking out.

"Stop!" I said looking at him now. This was so hard.

"What did I do?" he asked. "Just tell me and I swear I'll change it or fix it!" He was begging. It only made this that much harder.

"Freddie-" I swallowed hard. "I need you turn around and walk out that door."

"Why?" he asked, on the verge of hysteria.

"Because I love you!" He let a tear fall. "Don't you get it? You and I have been through the ringer and I don't want you to suffer dire consequences. I know how much you love me. It'll make it harder on you after I'm-" He cut me off.

"Don't you...say that. You are not going anywhere!" He was stubborn, I gave him that. It still wasn't making it any easier on me.

"You can't just-" I started.

"You are so-" he interrupted.

We kept interrupting each other until we both said at the exact same moment,

"I LOVE YOU!" I let the tears spill over.

"I know you do. I love you as much as you love me. That's what's scary. I can't let someone as important as you go through this." I literally felt as if my heart had dropped. Like a giant rock into my stomache. And, no, it didn't feel all that great.

"Don't _you _get it, Puckett?" He smirked as he called me that. "I didn't fall in love with the Puckett who was always looking for the easy way out. I fell in love with Sam Puckett. My blonde-headed demon. And that girl would never give up. I knew it since Carly introduced us," he said. I sat on my bed and he sat on the side.

"What do you mean 'you knew it'? What did you know?" I asked, curiously.

"That I would fall in love with you." I stared at him in disbelief. He'd never told me that before. "I also knew other things." I gestured for him to continue.

"I knew you hated my guts. You probably wanted to beat me to a pulp." I laughed at that. He did too.

"I knew you weren't at the best place family wise. Your father," I looked down immediately. He and I don't talk. He left when me and Melanie were seven. I was young, but I was old enough to remember that I understood what was going on. It hurt. Freddie was there for me that whole time. "He had just left. So, I knew I needed to be a friend." I told him he could stop, but he just kept going. "I knew that you tried to push me away most of the time. The closer we got the more it scared you. Heck, you even scared me. Point is, the Puckett I know has never been a quitter and she's not gonna start now." I had a tear-stained face by then. I gave up.

"Can I tell you something?" I asked him.

"Yeah?" he said, raising an eyebrow.

"My bucket list," I said. "I want you to read it. Not now, but when you're alone." He thought this was a strange request, but he gave up and agreed.

A nurse walked in as if on cue and said, "Mr. Benson, visiting hours are over." He kissed my forehead and whispered in my ear, "Don't give up, Sammy." Sammy. He used to call me that all the time. I only liked it when it came out of his mouth. He walked out and I closed my eyes. In minutes, I had drifted off to sleep.

* * *

Freddie walked home that night and went into his room. He immediately opened the bucket list and started to read:

SAM PUCKETT'S BUCKETT LIST

In no particular order:

1. Get married

2. Have kids

3. Go to Hawaii

4. Get Freddie Benson to see how much I love him

5. Own a restaurant (that sells meat)

6. Find my dad

7. Have a moment that's totally cheesy like a movie

8. Survive Cancer

9. Grow old with the person I love, Freddie

10. Live every moment like it might be my last, because tomorrow could be my last day on Earth

Freddie cried. He didn't know what to say. He wished he could make it all disappear. He knew what he was going to do. He picked up the phone.

It rang and someone answered,

"Hello? Freddie?" a female voice answered.

"Yeah, Carly, I need your help," he said desperately.

_January 29th_

_I feel good this morning. I feel like something good is going to happen. I have to hope. I mean, what else can I do? Somebody's coming._

_Later,_

_Sam Puckett_

"Hey, Sam!" My brunette best friend came over and hugged me.

"Hey, Stranger," I replied.

"Hey, so, what was with the whole freak-out-on-Freddie thing yesterday?" Freddie just _had_ to tell Carly.

"Look, you don't understand." She sighed. "With Freddie and I, you can't see sparks, but you can feel them. He's that one person, that one I can't imagine what I'd be like without him. I see him and everything is perfect. I don't want him to hurt. I'm already hurting enough for the both of us." Carly looked at me like she was trying to tell me something.

"What?" I responded.

"You guys were meant to be, don't you see that? He can't just leave you. He's Freddie. Not a jerk," she explained. I knew she was right.

"Look I love him-" She stopped me.

"I'm not the one you should be talking to." I was lost and confused.

Freddie walked in. "Hey," he said to Sam. Turning to the only other person in the room, he said, "Thanks, Carly."

"Thanks for what? What is going on here?" I was confused out of my mind. Carly left and Freddie and I were left alone.

"Did you read my bucket list?" I asked, trying to ignore what had just happened.

"Yeah, I did. And do you recall me telling you I love you, and that I'd do anything, just in case?" he asked, not wanting to say the word.

"Yeah, but-" He interrupted me. Him and Carly, wow. They won't let me finish!

"Come with me," he said, helping me up. I said whatever and followed him. He covered my eyes and walked me down to the hospital lobby. I opened them and everyone we knew was there. Mrs. Benson, my mom, Carly, Spencer, and so many more.

"What are they all doing here?" I asked.

"Well, I have a gift for you, Puckett." Oh, boy. Okay, I love Benson, but when it comes to gifts...

"What is it?" I said, dreading the "surprise".

"Four words." Words? What the chiz was he talkin' about?

"Which are?" Get on with it, Benson.

"Will you marry me?"

**A/N: SO CUTE! AHHHH! I love it! Okay, sorry but I thought I did a good job. Tell me what you think! Please Review! Thanks for reading and your support! :)**


	6. iAm Losing Hope

**A/N: So, I know I left this one on a cliffhanger, but would stories be interesting without 'em? Anyway, I'm dedicating this one to a few people:**

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**Thank you for your support on my one-shot ****Rescue Me****! It made me happy to see how good the feedback was! **

**Also, thanks to those who read it. It makes me happy when people read it! One more thing: If you can, PLEASE REVIEW! I love to hear what y'all think!**

**Alright, I'll shut up. Here's a new chapter! Hope you enjoy! HAPPY EASTER!**

**Chapter 6: iAm Losing Hope**

"Will you marry me?" I had just heard Freddie say. I was feeling so many emotions at that particular moment; it was mind-boggling. I looked at our families. I looked around seeing many encouraging nods, urging me to say yes, and I even saw Mrs. Benson give me assurance that she was okay with it. Shocking, right?

I leaned down a little, "Are you sure about this, Benson?" I asked him quietly, as if the slightest sound would cause the world to explode. "I mean, this...this is forever."

He was still looking into my eyes when he said, "I'm perfectly aware, Puckett." He stood up and continued in the same tone I'd used only moments before, "Do you remember me saying that I want to be with you as long as I have you?" I nodded. That was the moment I knew that this could be a chick-flick. "Well, this is me"—he swallowed hard—"keeping that promise." See? Told ya.

He made me shed a tear, but I wiped it away quickly after it came. He loved me, that's when I knew it, that moment.

It seemed as if the world had stopped, time had frozen. Everyone's eyes were on me, awaiting the anticipated answer.

"You promise you love me? You'll love me forever?" I asked, hopefully.

"Forever," he said reassuringly.

"Then, how could I say no?" He kissed me and I smiled against his lips. I'm sure everyone was happy with the answer, but honestly, in that moment, it was only us. He picked me up and spun me around. One of the best moments _ever_.

* * *

A while later, I was back in my hospital bed. Freddie was at my side.

"So," I started, "does everything have to be a chick-flick with you?" He laughed at the comment, knowing that it was true.

"Yeah, I guess so." He kept that goofy smile on his face.

"Are you sure about this whole wedding thing? I don't want you to feel like you _have _to marry me," I said in a very low voice.

"I told you, this is forever. Me and you, forever." He kissed my hand softly.

"So, how's it all gonna work? The wedding plans?" I asked, curiously.

"Well," he said, "Carly's planning most of it, Spencer's gonna walk you down the aisle, Gibby and Spencer will be my best men..." I laughed at that part. "Trust me, you have nothing to worry about."

"Okay, but I'm a little worried about Carly planning the whole thing," I said, as he laid down next to me. He hugged me and in his embrace, I had never felt more safe.

"It'll be fine. I promise," he said. "Sam, have I ever told you that I love you?" He asked, as his kissed the top of my head.

"So many times that I don't think I can count that high." That earned a chuckle from him.

After a moment, I said, "I love you too, Benson."

* * *

_February 1st_

_So Freddie proposed. Honestly, I'm so happy that he did. I've been hiding how scared I am. If this is my life, and it will end sooner than later, then I need to enjoy it while I have it._

_Later,_

_Sam Puckett_

I closed the journal as I heard Freddie waking up.

"Hey, Puckett, what goes on?" He was so out of it. It was like he had never woken up.

"Wait a minute," I said. "Did you stay here _all night_?"

"Yeah, where else would I go?" he asked, smiling.

As a tall doctor walked in, Freddie instantly sat up, like the doctor was an alarm clock.

"Hey, Sama-" he started.

"Next person who calls me Samantha...my name is Sam," I said, angrily.

"Hey, Sam. And you are?" he asked, looking at Freddie.

"Freddie Benson."

"Right, well, Sam, how we doing today?" Why do doctors always have to beat around the bush? Just spit it out!

"Just cut to the chase. What's going on?" I was very impatient, but, then again, don't I have a right to be? I mean this is a life-threatening disease we're talking about here.

"The chemo is not doing any damage, but it's not helping you either. That doesn't mean it won't work, it just means that it may take longer to get you healthy again." Freddie looked like a deer in headlights.

"What does this mean?" Freddie said urgently. Sometimes, he was more worried than I was.

"There is still hope. Don't give up, Sam." He walked out of the room and Freddie and I were left to ponder what we had just heard.

"I'm not gonna give up," I said to Freddie, "because I love you and my family, my friends and because my life can't end like this. I won't let it," I said.

"That's the Puckett I know, and that's why I love you."

"Why do you think I love you?" I asked curiously.

"Because I'm unbelievably attractive to you?" That was the funniest thing I had heard all day.

"Yeah, that's it," I said, sarcastically. I started to laugh.

"I love ya, Puckett."

"I know," I replied, matter-of-factly. "How did you get your mom to be okay with the wedding?"

"I told her that I would move out again, and when that didn't work,"—I smiled—"I told her I would never love anyone more than you and that would never change. I said I would propose whether she approved or not because I love you." That made me grin from ear-to-ear.

"Thank you, Benson." He seemed surprised.

"For what?"

"For being here." I paused. "When I need you." We hugged each other tighter.

"It's a two-way street, Puckett." In a few short minutes, I was sleeping.

The worry he had been hiding came onto his face. "Don't die on me, please. I can't live without you."

A single, hot tear drifted down his cheek.

**A/N: So, I know it's kind of a bittersweet chapter. I hope you still enjoyed reading it! Please review!**


	7. A Force To Be Reckoned With

**A/N: Hey everyone! I would like to start this out with some shoutouts to some people who've really been supportive of me lately. Thank you for your kindness. I really appreciate it:**

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**Also, thanks to all my ****Anonymous Reviewers****! Thanks for all your support!**

**Disclaimer: All rights go to Dan Schneider & Nickelodeon!**

**Chapter 7: A Force To Be Reckoned With**

"...so, I thought maybe we'd have the ceremony in the lobby and-" Carly had started. She had spent four hours telling me her plans for the wedding. She had every little detail down to the color of the napkins. She had _way _too much time on her hands.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," I said, holding up my right hand, my palm facing her, "I am _not _getting married in the hospital."

I moved my bed so I was sitting up more and she sat down sitting a purple binder next to her. Yes, Carly Shay was planning my wedding using a purple binder. She scooted the chair towards me.

"Where do you want to get married then?" She asked. She possessed a grin that suggested she was annoyed yet she hadn't expected me to love _everything_ about the wedding. She knew that she knew me better than that.

"I want to remember it," I stated. My tone had changed, lowering and becoming serious. She looked at me, puzzled. That really wasn't an answer to her question, "If I go, which we all know is a very good possibility-"

"Sam," Carly interrupted. She wouldn't face the truth. She knew what was going to happen. Option A: I get cured and I live or Option B: I die. Personally, I like Option A better, "you know that-"

"Carly, let me finish," She sighed, giving up. She gestured for me to continue, "I want to remember how beautiful it was. I want to remember that I married Freddie. That I got to be with him. That I was happy," Carly's expression had fallen. Her lips formed a small frown while her eyes resembled a sad puppy's, "I want to remember everything. I don't want to remember this wedding in a hospital."

Carly was speechless. Her face killed me. She got up, grabbed her binder and said, "I'll see what I can do."

Carly walked out and shut the door behind her. She walked down the hallway, releasing the tears she had prevented me from seeing.

* * *

"Your type of Leukemia," He started. He looked like he was struggling to say whatever he wanted to say to me. He was a middle-aged, taller doctor. He told me they have new information for me, "it's-"

Suddenly, I heard the door open. I turned to see a familiar, brown-haired figure. He walked over to me, kissed my head and then, noticed the doctor.

"What's going on here?" He asked, concern mainly in his voice. The doctor and I looked at each other, but Freddie was looking at me. The room was silent, still for a moment.

"Freddie, can you go get Carly? I wanted to talk with her about the wedding some more." Freddie looked at me, seeming to not buy it, but he nodded, walking out. When I heard the door shut I said, "We have about twenty minutes."

"How do you know that?" He asked, curious on how I could've predicted that so easily.

"Because Carly's at the Groovy Smoothie." The doctor nodded in understanding. Then he continued.

"It's rarely treatable," My throat closed up, and I was unable to respond. I was dying, _really_ dying, "You only have a ten percent chance of surviving."

I didn't know what to say. I knew there was a chance, but I didn't want to believe it. The doctor walked out, obviously noticing my expression. I was alone and started to cry. I got up out of the hospital bed, wanting to go to the bathroom before anyone saw me.

When I reached the hallway, Freddie was leaning up against the wall that was right by my hospital room door. He saw my face and quickly pulled me into a hug.

"How much did you hear?" I muttered into his shoulder. He kissed my cheek and said, "All of it."

I told him how scared I was, and he helped me get back in my bed.

"As scared as I am," I told him, "I'm not going to die. I won't. I'll be that ten percent." It was silent.

Freddie looked at me and slowly smiled. He had a smirk on his face which caused me to question him about it, "What?"

He gently kissed me and said, an inch away from my lips, "I love you."

My lips curled upward as I kissed him again.

* * *

"Wait," Carly called out to one of my doctors. She needed to ask them about me, "Can I ask something about Sam?" The doctor turned to face her. It was the same doctor who had told me earlier about my Leukemia.

"I can't tell you, it's confidential," He replied sincerely. Carly was annoyed.

"No, I wanted to ask you about...Wait, what can't you tell me?" The doctor realized that the status of my health _wasn't_ what she was talking about.

"I can't tell you," He repeated. Carly got angry then.

"Sam is like my sister. If something's wrong I need to know," she explained. The doctor studied her face.

He then proceeded to tell her the news I'd only heard a few hours earlier.

A couple of minutes later she came raging into my room, "You're dying!"

"Aren't we all?" I joked.

"This isn't funny!" Freddie was asleep beside me. I got up and hugged Carly.

"I'm not going anywhere. I promise," I said, trying to comfort her, "I'm gonna fight this, and I _will_ win."

That's when I started to feel dizzy. I was seeing double. I stepped away from Carly. She said something, but I couldn't tell what it was.

Then, everything went black.

"Sam!" She called. That woke Freddie up.

"Nurse! Nurse!" The nurses and doctors pushed them out of the way. They began trying to revive me.

A few minute later they were successful and I was back in my bed.

"Sam?" Freddie asked. I woke up and turned around.

"Am I okay?" I asked, slowly regaining consciousness. They went on to explain it was a symptom of the Leukemia. I tried to pay attention to the doctor's detailed explanation on what had happened and why, but my eyes kept wondering over to Carly and Freddie, who seemed more petrified than ever. When the doctor left, they came over to talk to me.

"Do you feel okay?" Carly asked, obvious concern covering her face as much as it did her tone.

"Yeah, but," I paused, sitting up a bit, "this thing is a force to be reckoned with."

Freddie smiled crookedly, "So are you."

I grinned widely at that comment, as he held my hand. Then Carly decided to say something.

"I got you a place for your wedding," Our heads shot in her direction, curious to see where the "big day" would take place.

"Where?" Freddie asked. He'd been completely out of the loop, wedding wise.

Carly resembled a sappy romantic when she said, "Where you first met."

**A/N: Hope you enjoyed it! Thanks again for your endless support! I think this story won't be too much longer, but we'll see. Please Review!**


	8. The Rise And The Fall

**A/N: I'm back! I know you probably didn't miss me, but I thought I'd post this anyway ;)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own iCarly or "Hot Blooded" by Foreigner.**

**Chapter 8: The Rise And The Fall**

_I had met Freddie the same year I had met Carly. One day, Carly and I went to the local park. It was so green and full of life. It was absolutely beautiful. Although, I really didn't want to go that day, Carly convinced me to with her groveling voice. _

_We'd been there for about an hour when Carly had decided to go to the bathroom. A moment later, a short-brunette kid walked up to me, "Are you friends with Carly?" _

_He looked a little shorter than me, but he reminded me of Carly, his face eager and perky. I gave him a questioning look, "Who's askin'?" He responded with, "I'm Fredward, but I liked to be called Freddie." I laughed lightly at the name and he gave a stern look, going on to tell me he lived across from Carly. I wondered why I hadn't seen him around, after all I had known Carly for a month._

_"And you are?" He curiously asked, his right eyebrow rose a bit._

_"Samantha, but I like to be called Sam," To my surprise he didn't laugh, but he smiled. I told him I was Carly's best friend. Freddie and Sam sat awkwardly for a moment._

_Then, Freddie said, "You want to see something?" I nodded and followed him. He led me to a large, wooden gazebo. I gave him a questioning look._

_"My dad built it," He explained. I saw that there was an engraving on the side. _

_"LOVE WHAT YOU HAVE BEFORE IT'S GONE"_

_It was so beautiful. Just then, Carly saw us, looking frantic, "Sam! Where have you-oh, hey, Freddie." She swallowed, "Have you met Sam?"_

_"Yeah," After that, Carly told me we had to go. She started to walk away. Freddie waved goodbye to us, and turned around._

_I gave a quick, "Bye, Benson." He grinned and replied with, "Later, Puckett."_

_That was one nice moment we had. Then, he started to show his feelings for Carly, and I turned invisible. I started being mean to him and he did the same._

"The park? How'd you get that to work?" I asked the brunette who was slightly grinning at her accomplishment. I had seen her this proud of herself before, but not for a good reason. The park was shut down for years because they were going to put up a new office building in its place. They had never gone through with it. Unfortunately, the wooden gazebo was scheduled to be removed from the property. It could have been anywhere by then.

"Mrs. Benson is paying for it," Freddie looked stunned. That was understandable because she wasn't exactly a big fan of me. His head tilted a bit, his mouth hung open, and his face silently asked for an explanation, "she told them she'd pay extra because she wants her son and future daughter-in-law to have the 'best wedding ever'." Now I was shocked. She got the park _and_ Mrs. Benson is okay with _paying_? She wants me to have a good wedding? Okay, I was shocked about her being okay with us engaged, but_ this_?

"She's really jumped on the bandwagon, hasn't she?" Freddie said, finally able to contain his astonishment.

"I guess so," After that, Freddie's phone beeped. He grabbed it out of his right pocket and looked at the screen.

"Speaking of my mom," Freddie started, "I guess we're going shopping for my tux." He hugged me gently, as if I could break at any second. Sometimes, it seemed as if he thought he'd hurt me if he did something slightly wrong. Maybe I was overanalyzing it, but he was in the same boat I was. We were both scared and uncertain.

Realizing this, I hugged him a little tighter, and murmured into his shoulder, "Tell her thank you."

He pulled back as his pupils widened showing less and less of the brown in his eyes. Then, he nodded and left, he knew what she meant, but was too taken aback to say another word.

Carly had finally come out and said, "Today is 'All About The Bride Day'." Okay, one of two things could happen. Either I would love what she has in mind or I would want to rip her head off by the end of the day.

She stepped out of the room and came back only minutes later with a black bag. She pulled out something that made me smile.

"Carly, how-?" I could not have been more thankful at that moment. That is how I wanted to picture my wedding. I didn't want to look like this.

The object was blonde and Carly grinned wide as she studied my expression.

It was a blonde wig.

"I had an exact replica of your hair style put on a wig," I gestured for further elaboration, "I sent them the last couple of iCarlys we did."

That was the other thing I had completely forgotten about. We hadn't done iCarly since we found out about my condition. What were we going to tell the fans? Did they hate us?

"Sam?" I raised my eyebrows as I turned my attention towards my best friend, "You alright?"

Then, realization washed over me, "Wait, why are you giving me that _today_?" She smiled widely. I'm pretty sure all of her teeth were visible, and I wondered if her mouth hurt from doing so much smiling all the time.

She took two steps to the right, and breathed deeply, "I do believe you're in need of a white dress."

* * *

The hospital only allowed us two hours out of there, angering me, but Carly said we'd just have to hurry. She was better at handling this than I was.

We'd gone through five dresses in a half an hour, all of them hideous. Carly and I looked through the racks, "Hot Blooded" by Foreigner started playing softly in the bridal store. I started dancing slightly, and Carly looked at me weird. I just laughed and continued searching.

Within the first hour, we'd found eleven dresses, but none of them were what I wanted.

Then, I tried on one that I was completely prepared to hate, but I loved it.

It was a white dress with the lightest blue tint. It was strapless and ball gown style. I put on the wig with it and a slightly tinted veil of the same color. I walked out, a bouquet of dark red roses in my hands, and Carly's hand covered her face.

"This is the one." Carly hugged me. She was as happy as I was that all of the elements of the wedding were finally coming together.

_March 1st,_

_Although my life seems to be running away from me, I have never been happier. My only problem is iCarly. How will I tell the fans? The truth is, if I die, I just don't want to say that we'll be back soon if I'm dying. I guess I'll just have to come out and say it; they _do_ deserve to know._

_Sam_

Freddie had come into my room. He told me the tortures of shopping with his mother. Afterwards, I said, "Can you do something for me?"

"Anything." He smiled. I grinned at the thought of him doing that for me, but it faded as quickly as it came when I realized what I was about to do...

"Are you sure about this?" Freddie said, positioning the camera on me. I was sitting upright in my hospital bed.

"Yup, go ahead." I said, I felt as if there was a rock in my throat as I found it hard to swallow.

"In 5,4,3,2-" He pointed and I began.

"Hey, everyone," I took a moment, "it's me, Sam. I have an explanation for not having done iCarly for the past few months. I've been diagnosed with Leukemia. I don't want anybody to be alarmed, but I want you all to know that this may be the last time you ever see me on iCarly dot com. We all know what the outcomes could be. Whatever happens, I want you to know, that you guys are amazing for being so supportive. Thank you, and another announcement, Freddie and I have been in a relationship and we've decided that we want to be with each other as long as we can. So, we're engaged. I just thought you should know that, but really, thank you. Goodbye, iCarly fans. Let's hope this will not be the last time you ever hear me say that." I smiled and Freddie turned the camera off. He walked up to me as he saw me tearing up. He held me as I started to cry into his shoulder, "I got you, Sammy."

**A/N: Anybody catch the Dawson's creek reference? The whole last paragraph was kind of referencing to Jen's speech in the series finale. Anyway, I really love this chapter, it's just building up to the main event of the wedding. This chapter is a big deal, you'll find out later why... ;)**


	9. Hold Onto The Memories

**A/N: This is what you voted for! This story is approaching it's ending, however, the next couple of chapters will be the most important. This one is important too, so enjoy it!**

**Disclaimer: iCarly is the property of the brilliant Dan Schneider.**

**Chapter 9: Hold Onto The Memories**

_March 3rd_

_It's been two days since I told the fans. Freddie told me that the comments have been supportive with the exception of the Creddie fan with a bad attitude. I'm really glad they understand. I've received several gift baskets and get well cards from people all over the nation. It's amazing how the fans have responded. _

_Also, this is my last week being single. Freddie and I are tying the knot next week. I'm excited, but part of me hopes that I can make it that long. I'm not sure how long I have. My ultimate goal is to live long enough to marry him._

_Sam_

"Bridesmaids, check," Carly was talking to herself. She had been really into the whole "wedding planner" thing. The checklist she held in her hand was so long that it reached the floor, "Freddie's tux, check," This was more entertaining than anything they had on TV at the hospital, "Chicken wings...wait, I didn't put that on the list...?"

"Sorry, that was me," I interjected, my smile wide. Carly put the list down and faced me.

"What's so funny?" She curiously asked. My smile softened as I spoke, "You! With your checklist and your conversations with yourself."

"I want this wedding to be perfect, okay? Don't judge me!" I smiled again, but pondered a question in my mind. Why was it so important to her? I mean, of course she'd want me to have a nice wedding, but I could read her like a book. It was something deeper.

"Why? It doesn't have to be perfect," I explained. Her face relaxed, making me notice that she had been tense since she walked in an hour before. She looked at the floor, thinking about how to respond.

"Do you remember that time that I almost got beat up by those mean sixth graders?" That was ages ago. Carly and I were both in fifth grade when some tough kids tried to beat her up. Of course, I interjected before they could do anything. Why did it matter? I simply nodded and she continued, "Well, you helped me. And...I wish I could've helped you."

"Wh-?" I started, wondering what exactly she was referring to.

"You got sick!" Her face made me want to cry. I shook my head, hoping that she'd stop, "I can't fix it! You could if it was me, but I can't! You know how awful that feels? You're my best friend and I'm gonna lose you!"

My face started to turn red, as I held so many tears in.

"This is my pathetic attempt at making everything you've done for me," She finished. She was full-on crying and I hugged her. My tears rushed out of my eyes like a waterfall as I tried to comfort her.

I couldn't believe she felt this way. It could never be her fault; nothing could've stopped it from coming.

"Just by being here," I said in a lower tone over her shoulder, "you've already made it up."

"I'll miss you," I let go of her.

"I'm not leaving! I'm staying here!" I exploded. She looked shaken, but nodded. She knew that I'd find a way.

My face relaxed when I said, "Now, go back to your checklist." She chuckled a bit and then picked up the list once more.

"Fried chicken..." She said, "I'll get on that." She walked out and I shook my head at her. I always loved how she could pick herself back up, "GIBBY!" Carly screamed, "I'M GONNA NEED YOU TO GET ME A CHICKEN!" I laughed at this unexplainable scene. Ever since she's taken over the wedding, she's been tense, but I could see that she really did enjoy planning it.

Freddie walked in...in a doctor's uniform, "Why are you wearing that?"

"This is the only way I could get in to see you," He kissed me and then held my hand, "They're busy admitting someone, and they said they'll speak with me in an hour, but visiting hours are over soon, so..." I nodded.

"Are you ready?" My smile reappeared on my face as I said that.

"For what?" He questioned.

"Our wedding?" My face was beaming with excitement. My number one was coming true.

His goofy smile was one of my favorite things about him, "I've been ready since I met you, I just didn't known it until recently."

He laid down next to me and we faced each other, "You know what the best part about this is?" He gestured for me to go on, "Even if I go, my number one came true."

"So will mine," he kissed me once more and he smiled. In his arms, I fell asleep.

* * *

The next day, I set up a video camera in my room at about seven in the morning. I woke up early to make a video. It was for everyone, just in case...well, you know.

It took a second, but I finally turned it on.

"If you're seeing this," I gulped, and tried to hold back tears that I knew were coming, "I didn't make it. You know how much I wanted to pull through, but sometimes it just doesn't work that way. I want you all to know that I'll miss you. Carly, you're my sister. You planned my dream wedding, and I will never be able to repay you. You've always had my back, and I'm sorry I can't be around anymore to do the same for you. Thank you for being there; I love you sis. Spencer, take care of her. She'll need you," This was way harder than I thought. Talking to Carly was hard enough, I imagined what it'd be like once I got to Freddie.

"Gibby, look after Freddie for me," Mentioning his name was hard, knowing that, if he watched this, I'd be dead, "iCarly fans, if they show this to you, thanks for watching. Hopefully, even though I'm gone, they'll still find a way to continue on without me," The big one was coming up. This was too hard, too much, but I had to do it.

"Freddie, I love you. The last couple of months have been hard, but I'm so glad I got to be with you until I went. There's only one thing I wish for you. Don't forget what we had, but it's okay," I let a tear fall, "to move on and find love again. I love all of you. Thanks for everything," I thought of what else to say, "Don't miss me too much, we'll see each other again, I promise," My final word, "Goodbye."

The camera clicked as I turned it off. As I wiped tears away, I thought of the wedding. My one thing that had to happen before...I died. There only was one thing left to do.

Wait until March 10th...

**A/N: Please review! :D**


	10. The Vows

**A/N: So, this is my last post of 2012. Thank you for all of the support this year. This story is now the longest story I have written thus far. It's just amazing how much it has become since I published it on February 21st of last year. You all made that happen. The reviewers, favoriters, followers, and readers. Thanks for doing all you do. This one's for you.**

**Disclaimer: iCarly is not mine.**

**Chapter 10: The Vows**

_"Sam Puckett, do you take Freddie Benson to be your wedded husband for as long as you both shall live?" A minister with a deep voice had said._

_"I do," My smile was wide, wider than it had been in a long time. Freddie took my hand as the minister asked him, "Freddie Benson do you take Sam Puckett to be your wedded wife for as long as you both shall live?"_

_"I do," Freddie replied, immediately following with the mouthing of 'I love you'._

_Just as I was about to do the same thing to him, everything went black. I fell to the floor, my bouquet flew out of my hands, and I was unconscious. Freddie tried to revive me and a after a few minutes the minister said, "She's dead."_

_Freddie cried as what the minister said repeated:_

_"She's dead...dead...dead."_

"No, no," Carly was alarmed, shaking me vigorously trying to wake me up. She continuously called my name until I finally woke up, "NO!"

I sat straight up, and took several deep breaths. That's when I realized I had been crying. Relief washed over me when I realized it was only a nightmare; it wasn't real. It's not like that could actually happen...

"Are you okay?" Carly sat down, trying to figure out what just happened.

"Yeah," I said, finally able to get my breathing back to normal, "It was just a nightmare."

I got out of bed and dusted off my hospital gown, "Let's get ready."

As I started walking out, she followed me, still worried, "Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm fine, it's my wedding day," I gave her a reassuring smile, "why wouldn't I be?"

Okay, so maybe the nightmare bothered me. What if something happened _during _the ceremony? Or the reception for that matter? It just seemed like the clock was ticking faster and faster lately. I felt like I was losing time; the time I had left.

That...well, that scared me more than anything, how quickly everything was happening. The 'What if this or this or that happened?' scenario had run through my mind about fifty times...a day. I just hoped that I'd be okay on my wedding day; one day I don't have to worry. It was going to be the most important day of my life, the one thing I wanted before...bad things happened. I just didn't want that happiness to slip away.

"I don't know, maybe because you woke up screaming and crying?" She did have a point. When I woke up, my face was drowning in tears and I was panting heavily. It was, in a word, intense.

"Listen, I just had a nightmare. It's no big deal," I tried to convince her, "Don't make it ruin my day."

She smiled, and I relaxed a little bit. The whole time we had been talking, I was continuously walking down the hallway. We were now standing in front of an elevator.

"Okay," That's when I noticed she was carrying a black bag, "I have something for you."

My eyes rolled, "Carly, gifts aren't until after the ceremony."

She laughed at me, and put the bag on the floor. She quickly unzipped it and pulled out a pair of jeans, a long sleeve shirt, and a pair of tennis shoes.

"And these clothes are for...?" I questioned. Why would I need an outfit like that? I was getting married, not going to a barbeque.

"For to wear," My expression became more and more confused by the second, "just put it on!"

I took the clothes from my best friend and proceeded to the bathroom.

* * *

We left the hospital. Dr. Reynolds said it was all right for me to leave the hospital if I was with someone and we didn't go too far.

The cab pulled up to a park, the park I was getting married at. Carly quickly rushed me out of the cab. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Freddie, and I ran to him. I was shocked to see him and he was too. He hugged me tightly.

"Not the surprise," Carly stated, smiling.

"Then..." I started.

"Why'd you bring us here?" Freddie finished and Carly smirked.

She told us to shut our eyes and she pulled us into the park and brought us to the surprise, "Open."

When I opened my eyes, and saw what was before me, I immediately looked at Freddie. He was as shocked as I was, "Is this...?"

Carly nodded and I just couldn't believe it, "Where you'll be getting married today."

"Really?" My mind had been blown, I couldn't believe it was still there. Freddie ran to it and I followed him and as he looked to see the inscription:

"LOVE WHAT YOU HAVE BEFORE IT'S GONE"

The gazebo looked just like it did the day we met. This was perfect for our wedding.

I went over to hug Carly, "Thank you."

After a moment we let go and I whispered, "I'm definitely going to remember it...no matter what."

Carly seemed to be overwhelmingly happy at that point, feeling like she had granted my 'dying wish'. She didn't realize how amazing that would feel.

Freddie came back over and hugged Carly, "Thank you."

His smile made me smile. It was one of the times he was happiest.

"Hey, what are friends for?" She responded, obviously satisfied with everything she'd accomplished.

* * *

"You will say 'I do' after the minister says 'Sam Puckett, do you take Freddie Benson to be your wedded husband for as long as you both shall live?' and vice versa..." Carly was running me through the ceremony. We were sitting in the park as people set up chairs and decorations for the wedding. She was just trying to help, but she was rambling.

"Can we change that?" I asked, remembering my nightmare from the night before.

"To what?" I had no clue. Some part of me just didn't want that in my wedding because of the nightmare. If it was, the nightmare could come true.

Then she smiled, "I got it..."

"Freddie Benson, do you take Sam Puckett to be your wife forever from this day forward?" I looked at Freddie, dressed in a black tux.

"I do," Everyone was watching. Our friends, our family, it was more than I could've hoped for. For me, it was a dream come true.

"Sam Puckett, do you take Freddie Benson to be your husband forever as long as you both shall live?" My response took a minute. I was too busy trying not to cry. So many things came to my mind at that moment, "I do."

"At this time, Sam and Freddie would like to share their vows," The minister said, stepping aside.

I went first, "Benson," He smiled at that, "you are the dorkiest person on the planet. You're annoying, and organized, and everything I'm not," Freddie looked like he was perplexed by my vows, "However, those are the reasons I love you. You are the first guy that stuck with me, no matter how cruel or mean I was or how hurt it made you to be around me. You stayed with me, through thick and thin. So, thank you, for what you've done for me."

His expression was full of excitement and I could see he was holding back tears as much as I was, "Sam, you have hurt me emotionally and physically, but you were worth it. You've always been tough and you have a good heart. I always find little things about you that I fall in love with. The way you treat Carly like a sister or how you say what's on your mind, no matter the consequence. I want you to know one thing: I'll be right here. I'll be true to you forever."

There were no words for the moment, "You may-"

We kissed before he could finish the sentence. He smiled as everyone clapped. It was the closest to perfect that it could've been.

This was the moment I decided, I was going to live through this.

**A/N: Happy New Year! See ya in 2013!**


	11. Misery Loves Company

**A/N: Okay, here is the next chapter! I'd like to dedicate my very first post of 2013 to vicTORIousfan6 (GUEST), RebelGirl13, Invader Johnny, pancake2, and ****x3BeforexThexStormx3**, my top reviewers of 2012. I really appreciate you taking the time to give me your feedback. Thank you!

**Disclaimer: iCarly is property of Dan Schneider & Nickelodeon.**

**Chapter 11: Misery Loves Company**

_March 11th_

_The ceremony was more than I could've hoped for. The reception...it was a night to remember. As I look back on yesterday, it made me realize that I was giving up way to easily. I really want to be out on the front porch fifty years from now with Freddie. I just don't care what the doctors say anymore. Leukemia has taken so many lives, but I'm not gonna let it take mine._

_-Sam_

I put the journal away beside my hospital bed. Freddie and I had decided that we'd hold off on the honeymoon until after I got better. Carly had been so happy with how the day before had went. This incredible feeling filled the air and I wanted more than anything for it to stay. It was the best I had felt, _everyone _had felt in a long time.

The door suddenly made a squeaky sound and Dr. Reynolds appeared, snapping me out of my thoughts, "I brought someone for ya." I figured it was Carly or Freddie; I hadn't see either one of them since the reception. So, I told them to come in.

To be honest, my mouth almost dropped when I saw who walked through the door. It was not who I thought it'd be. Dr. Reynolds looked at both of us and then said, "I'll let you two talk amongst yourselves." He left, closing the door behind him.

She walked over and sat in a chair beside my hospital bed, "How are you doing, Sam?"

"I'm fine," My eyes studied hers, and she didn't look like she usually did. The weirdest thing was that it wasn't weird at all. She wasn't angry or crazy. It was the first time I saw her that way.

Mrs. Benson.

"I just came by to check on you; make sure you're okay," It looked like she wanted to say more, but was hesitant. I could see it written on her face, and just when I thought she wouldn't continue, she did, "and I'm sorry."

"For?" Of course she had been crazy and a pain at times, but she had never done anything wrong. So why did she feel the need to apologize?

"Not giving you a chance. I always thought that you were just an awful person, and horrible to be around. The way you treated Freddie..." I swallowed hard, knowing that I couldn't blame her. If I was her, I would've felt the same way, "but now, I know so much more about you. Freddie talks about you so much, and he always notes the good things."

She breathed deeply before saying more, "He smiles when you're in his life, Sam," That made _me _smile, "and I know you're special, I know you must be a good person at heart because I haven't seen him this happy since his dad was still around," She was holding back tears, trying not to remember. He had talked about it before, and I could feel their pain. The worst part was that I could relate to it...a dad gone forever, "so thank you."

We actually hugged, and I knew she was still going to be crazy, but she accepted who I was and that I was in love with her son.

"So, is that why you said yes?" I questioned, "To our marriage?"

"Yes," She simply stated, her smile big.

It struck me then: I had forgotten about something. The feeling turned from light-hearted to seriousness.

"Can you do something for me?" I asked her. My hand reached over to grab a tape.

"What exactly?" She looked at the tape, curious of what I was getting at.

"I'm going to try to live through this, but if I lose this fight," I handed her the tape, "Give this to Freddie and Carly for me."

"I will," A tear drifted down her cheek, hoping that she wouldn't have to give it to him. After a moment she wiped the tear away and asked me a question, changing the subject, "Where's _your_ mom?"

"She's been coming in at night. She sneaks in the hospital and picks the lock to my room," She smiled at me, "but Melanie, my sister, she hasn't been in. My mom told her, but she didn't come. She didn't even come to the wedding."

"Freddie told me about that," She proceeded to tell me about the dinner conversation about the whole thing. He was trying to figure out everything, if Melanie was real or if I was just messing with him and he wouldn't stop trying, until I told him that lie; that it was me, "She'll be here."

"She knows," I explained, trying to get her to understand, "she would've been here by now. I just wanted to apologize. After everything with my dad happened, him leaving, I took it out on Melanie," I started to cry and she looked at the floor. It was so hard to remember what happened with my dad. I tried to block it out, but it was permanently etched in my brain, every detail of that day, "but she's like Freddie," Mrs. Benson looked up, confused when I said that, "Even when I'm a pain, she sticks around through thick and thin."

"Well, this is thick," I laughed at that, and she did a little bit too. It was funny, I'd never seen Mrs. Benson joke around before. It was a really nice side of her. I'm glad I got to see it, "She'll be here."

"Thank you," we hugged again, and even though Melanie hadn't come and I still hoped she would, I was truly happy.

* * *

_Riiiiiiiiiiing! Riiiiiiiiiiiiing! _I reached over to grab the phone and held it up to my ear, "Hello?"

"Sam?" I couldn't believe it, Mrs. Benson was right. After I'd given up all hope of hearing from her, it was good to be proven wrong for once.

"Melanie? Is that you?" My tone expressed how shocked I was. As much as I tried, I couldn't contain it.

"Yeah, I was calling to ask you if it was okay if..." She paused for a moment, as if trying to find the words to finish the sentence, "maybe...I come to see you?"

I told her yes and before I knew it my door opened, "Good because I'm almost out of minutes." There my sister was standing at the door and I instantly hung up the phone.

Melanie hung up her cell phone and came over to hug me.

"Why didn't you come to the wedding?" I asked her the burning question, that's what upset me the most. My other burning question was 'Why haven't you come to see me at all?', but I figured that I should ask the one that bothered me the most.

"I did. I was in the back. You're always seem angry when I'm around, I didn't want you to be angry on your wedding day or on any other day for that matter." I smiled at her and explain why I'd been mean to her all these years, and she understood. That's what sisters are for after all, to stick by you.

We talked for hours about the whole thing with Freddie and some memories from when we were little. She finally left and said she'd come by again the next day.

I was about to go to sleep when..._knock knock_! So much for sleeping...

"Come in!" My tone came across as angry, but I was just tired. Okay, maybe just a little angry, but that's only because I was ticked that Freddie hadn't come to see me. We just got married! You'd think he'd at least stop by.

When I saw who it was I realized something: things were finally going my way.

"Care for some company?" He gave his goofy grin, which made me smile.

"You're such a dork," Freddie walked over and kissed me. When we separated, he said, "I love you too."

He laid next to me and held me. It was almost as perfect as the wedding day. I thought back to the previous visits from Mrs. Benson and Melanie, "Hey, Freddie?"

"What?" He asked, as we looked at each other.

"Can I ask you something?" His face became concerned and worried. It wasn't like it was anything serious though. He gestured for me to continue, "Well, do you remember that date you had with Melanie?"

"Why are you bringing that up now?" It was almost like he was laughing at how random the question was. I gave him a serious look and he nodded.

"Why did you let her kiss you?" He looked confused, so I tried to explain, "Melanie told me about it when she came earlier."

"She was here?" Of course he was shocked, but I had told him what happened and I told him about his mom too. My judgment's not the greatest, but I think you could say he was genuinely happy we were getting along.

"I let her because," He started, he looked at me and smiled, "I thought she was you."

After that, he kissed my cheek. We sat in silence for a few moments, and then he asked, "How are you feeling?"

"Weak, but you know," I paused for a second and then continued, "misery loves company."

An hour later, visiting hours were over. He left and I tried to go to sleep, but I was too happy.

It was only a second later when it happened. After the most perfect day...

...came the worst.


	12. The One Thing That Won't Change

**A/N: This chapter is it, the next one will be the epilogue. Before you read this, I'd like to say something. On the second chapter of this story, I told you to read until the end and I still mean that. This story is a figment of my imagination, and look what it has turn into. Thanks for that. Hold on to the end, guys and gals. Just trust me.**

**Disclaimer: iCarly is not mine.**

**Chapter 12: The One Thing That Won't Change **

Freddie was in bed when he heard the phone ring. Usually, he'd sleep through it, but he hadn't had a restful night since he found out about my Leukemia.

"Freddie?" Mrs. Benson peeked into the room, with a questioning look on her face, "It's three in the morning, who's calling?"

Freddie shrugged and went to answer it, "Hello?"

"Freddie, it's me," Freddie covered the bottom of the phone and mouthed 'It's Carly' to his mom.

"Why are you calling so late?" He questioned, rubbing his eye with his free hand. Mrs. Benson left the room, heading towards the kitchen.

Freddie heard a rustling sound in the background when she said, "Get to the hospital, now!"

His face turned to horror, he knew what was going on, "What happened?!"

"It's Sam! Just go! I'll meet you there in a few," Carly sounded urgent, as if nothing else mattered. The only thing that did was getting there before it was too late.

Freddie hung up, and threw on a shirt over his gray tank top, and left his pajama bottoms on. He slipped on some black shoes, grabbed his keys and headed to the door.

"Where are you going?" Mrs. Benson was having a cup of coffee when Freddie ran through. She set the cup down and rose from her chair, full of concern.

He gulped, "Sam's in trouble!" Mrs. Benson grabbed her purse and ran after him as he ran out the door.

* * *

They busted through the hospital doors and ran up towards the room. A few doctors they'd never seen before stopped them.

"I'm sorry, no one's allowed down here," Two doctors, one woman and one man were standing right in front of them. Freddie pushed past them after a moment and, of course, they tried to hold him back.

"Freddie," All eyes turned to the voice that spoke. Dr. Reynolds motioned for the doctors to leave them alone. Mrs. Benson stayed beside Freddie as he continued, "sit down."

They all sat down and Freddie looked panic-stricken. The last time they were sitting like this, he was told about my Leukemia. Now he felt that more bad news was coming.

"Sam," He began. The past few months, he had really enjoyed having me as a patient. My love of life and how strong I was made him recognize something he had long forgotten: his job _meant_ something, "She's in a coma."

Freddie held back what he was feeling, gesturing for Dr. Reynolds to continue. You could tell it was hard for all of them, Dr. Reynolds included, "Sam's chances of waking up are slim to none, Freddie. She's not going to make it."

The tears ran down his face, but his expression didn't change. I was gone.

"Let me see her," Dr. Reynolds nodded and Freddie went in alone. My still body lay there; the only sound came from the machines. As he approached my bedside, his hand touched mine.

"I love you," He brushed a strand of hair out of my face, and leaned down to kiss me. It sank in when I didn't kiss back.

Out of the corner of his eye, he caught a glimpse of a brown book. Freddie picked it up, examining it. Embroidered on the bottom was my name. He looked through it and stopped at my last journal entry:

_March 11th_

_If you're reading this, you're probably Freddie (I know you so much better than you think). You know how hard I fought in this, and I'm trying with everything I have to hold on. Dr. Reynolds said I wasn't even supposed to make it this long. I'm writing this because I wanted to thank you for everything. You've been my best friend even when I wasn't one to you. I love you, Benson. I want you to know, whatever happens, that's the one thing that won't change. _

_Love,_

_Puckett_

Freddie closed the book and looked at me again, "Don't worry, Sammy. I'll see you on the other side."

He ran out of the hospital and his mom soon followed. They arrived home a few minutes later.

"Dr. Reynolds said, they'll contact us if she wakes up, or-" She stopped, finding it hard to say. Then, she decided to finish the thought with something else, "I need to give you something."

She got up, and said, "Tell Carly to come over, she'll want to see this too."

* * *

Carly came with Spencer and Mrs. Benson decided to explain, "Sam gave this to me to give to you."

It was a tape, the tape I had made. She told them to watch it and walked away, border line crying.

Carly put it in, afraid of what she'd see:

_"If you're seeing this, I didn't make it."_

That alone was hard to hear, but they continued to watch.

_"You know how much I wanted to pull through, but sometimes it just doesn't work that way. I want you all to know that I'll miss you. Carly, you're my sister. You planned my dream wedding, and I will never be able to repay you. You've always had my back, and I'm sorry I can't be around anymore to do the same for you. Thank you for being there; I love you sis. Spencer, take care of her. She'll need you." _

Spencer comforted Carly as she started to cry.

_"Gibby, look after Freddie for me. iCarly fans, if they show this to you, thanks for watching. Hopefully, even though I'm gone, they'll still find a way to continue on without me."_

Freddie shook his head no. How could they? They had lost an important part of the show; a third of their trio.

_"Freddie, I love you. The last couple of months have been hard, but I'm so glad I got to be with you until I went. There's only one thing I wish for you. Don't forget what we had, but it's okay to move on and find love again. I love all of you. Thanks for everything. Don't miss me too much, we'll see each other again, I promise. Goodbye."_

Moving on would be hard, but it's what I wanted and he knew he had to.

A few minutes later, Carly and Spencer left and Mrs. Benson went to bed. Freddie remained awake. He snuck out to the fire escape and sat in that chair he sat in on the night we first kissed.

He turned to look at the window.

_"That was really brave," He started, "what you said."_

_"You heard?" _

_"You didn't think I'd miss iCarly?" She grinned._

He smiled at the memory, but it hurt. Looking down, he glanced at his wedding ring.

_"I love you." Freddie said as she started to leave._

_"I love you too."_

Letting go would take time, but he knew he had to. Still looking at the ring, he smiled slightly said into the night, "Always."

**A/N: Remember what I said...hold on. Epilogue is coming soon, please check my profile for updates.**


	13. Epilogue: The Fighter

**A/N: Thanks for the gigantic support on this story. This is the longest story I've ever written, but it's one of my favorites. It's hard to say goodbye, but I think I'm sending it off in the best way possible.**

**Disclaimer: All rights go to Dan and Nickelodeon.**

**Epilogue: The Fighter**

It had been six months and not one call from the hospital. Freddie assumed that _it _happened and they were too afraid to.

He hadn't bothered to visit. It hurt too much to see me like that. Even though it'd been a long time, he just couldn't let me go. He knew that's what I wanted, but it was the hardest thing to actually do.

Carly, Freddie and Spencer had spent time together, trying to heal the wounds. Carly was devastated, and kept to herself since they found out. Spencer tried to be there for her, but she was like a turtle, hiding under her shell.

They were all in Carly's apartment, sitting around the kitchen table, about to have dinner. The table was silent as they started to eat, and then Carly finally spoke, "Can we talk about it?"

"Talk about what?" Freddie questioned, cutting up his spaghetti with a fork.

"The thing we _don't_ talk about, Freddie," Freddie dropped his fork on the plate and went into the living room, "Look, Sam wouldn't want this! She would want us to move on and be happy!"

"How can I be happy, Carly?!" He explained, "I lost my wife!"

He collapsed on the couch and Carly sat next to him. Spencer walked over to them, "Look, guys, Carly's right. Sam wants all of us to move on. You know what you should do? Do an iCarly, that's what she would've wanted. I know it's not the same, but just do one more, for her."

Carly and Freddie looked at each other.

* * *

"Hey everybody," Freddie held the camera, as Carly spoke, "Listen, we've been told that Sam won't make it, so this is goodbye. Thank you for all of your support-"

_Knock, knock!_

Freddie put on a pre-take video as we exited the studio.

"Who is it?" Carly called as she came down the stairs.

"Dr. Reynolds," Freddie froze, afraid of why he was there, "I have something for you." They heard him walk away. What did he mean? Freddie walked over and opened the door.

"What took you so long? I should've just picked the lock," I smiled as he picked me up and spun me around.

My hair had grown back and I was healthy. It turns out that I'm part of the small percentage that survived from this disease.

After hugging Freddie, I hugged Carly and Spencer, "I'm fine. So, I guess you guys are stuck with me."

"What about iCarly?" Spencer said. Carly grabbed Spencer and pulled him up the stairs.

"Banner year, huh?" I joked, laughing as his face remained serious. He sat with me on the couch. His face made me realize something, "You watched it didn't you?"

"Yes," He admitted.

"I'm sorry," Freddie looked confused, "that I put you through this."

He smiled as he looked at me, "You're here, you're healthy, and that's enough for me. I love you, Sammy."

"I love you too, Fredward." We leaned closer, but as our lips almost touched, he asked me a question, "How did you make it through that?"

"I'm a fighter," I said, "No disease will ever change that."

We gently kissed and after nine months of torment, everything turned up.

That was the moment I knew that I wasn't just fighting for life...I was fighting for love.

**A/N: PLEASE REVIEW!**


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